I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
