He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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