She's JV to your varsity
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
