I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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