i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize