Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I would fuck him just for his dog
that is very illegal...i love you.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
