No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
only if we run a train.
done.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Randomize
