She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
