I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize