butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
