Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize