Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(719): View more from Colorado

then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.

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(925): View more from California

DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(310): View more from California

I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too

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(951): View more from California

I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved

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(650): View more from California

Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"

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(214): View more from Texas

Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."

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