I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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