They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
