at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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