Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
