it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
