i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
