i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
