i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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