you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
