The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize