Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
