we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
