he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
We're too hungover to prance.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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