well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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