Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
