Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
