She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
