Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Success! We fucked roommates!
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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