One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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