I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
