So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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