So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
