Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize