So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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