Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
