I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
