you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
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we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
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I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Someone came in the potted fern
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY