You're completely useless in the revolution.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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