She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Just pee around me
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
