i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
