and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
