I think i peed on brittanys purse
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize