we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night