drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
