I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize