yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
