would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
