just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
