elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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